Sep 06

Poorly Translated Victor Claver: 'It would be nice to travel in a spaceship'

By caseyholdahl Posted in: victorclaver
If you followed the Trail Blazers waaaaay back in the Rudy Fernandez days, you might be familiar with Marca, the Spanish newspaper that always has an interesting take on Spaniards in the NBA. Today, they posted an 18-question Q&A with Victor Claver, who will join the Trail Blazers this season after being drafted with the 22nd pick in the 2009 Draft.

If you're fluent, go ahead and read the actual text, but if your understanding of Spanish tends to be more rudimentary, here's the Google Translation version, which produced some great lines, such as ...
1. Did you know that Portland is forbidden that the driver of the car down for refueling himself?
I did not know, but better. So much more comfortable.
This is, of course, in reference to our famous law prohibiting pumping your own gas in Oregon.
4. In his new city proliferate liquor breweries and distilleries. Miss? Reeds and tapas in Spain?
Yes, sure I'll miss the food of Spain. I'm not one to go out to dinner every day outside, but I have to find something. I've heard of a Spanish restaurant which is not bad.
I'd bet a plate of potatoes bravas that Sergio told Victor about Patanegra
5. Portland is the greenest city in America. What would you say to those who think you are green to the NBA?
I do not say anything, I will play when there playing show why I made this decision.
That's a nice bit of wordplay there by the folks at Marca, though in question no. 2, the translation says "Portland is known as the pink city", which leads me to believe that the word for "rose" and "pink" is being lost in translation (get it!).
7. Portland is a city with almost no taxes. Now that Spain has raised VAT, is a definite plus.
Yes, at first seems an advantage, because we have complicated things a bit. We will have to use it.
Always a good reminder, especially during election season, that we in the United States have some of the lowest tax rates in the world.
9. Matt Groening, the creator of the Simpsons, is Portland. Which character do you like most about this series?
It is impossible to miss, for thousands of years emitting it on television. I think I'll stick with Homer, is the one with more grace.
Vic and I are going to be total Simpsons bros. And Homer does have a certain understated grace.
11. And did you know that Portland has the largest number of clubs 'striptease' 'per capita' across the United States?
So I do not ... (Laughs) I'm just going to have time to train, play, and, when possible, be in house.
Saying all the right things early. That Rookie Transitions program is already paying dividends.
12. Paul Allen, billionaire owner of the Blazers, is investing a lot of money in the space adventure. Dare to exercise its new chief astronaut?
It would be nice to travel in a spaceship, not frighten me. From that height would have a nice view. I would take a picture from there.
Seriously, when Mr. Allen starts wooing free agents by taking them on trips to the Moon, all of you who made fun of his endeavors are going to be eating crow.
17. The Twilight saga was filmed in Portland. Are you afraid of vampires? What scares Claver?
That always gives a little scary, but not so much the movie. Only coaches dangerous scare me (laughs).
So we're all good if Terry Stotts is actually a vampire. One less thing to worry about.


  1. This made my day and it's only 10am! Thanks Case :)

    by sarahhecht on 9/6/2012 9:13 AM
  2. Good piece Mr Casey.

    by Hg on 9/6/2012 10:08 AM
  3. Funny foreigners!

    by mbmurr1 on 9/6/2012 10:22 PM
  4. Go Victor!! You'll play well in the Blazers.

    by bosoos on 9/10/2012 2:26 AM
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